So first things first, my job. My job is... unclear. I am in a new office on a new base near Gedera, about a 40 min bus ride from Jerusalem. Which means it only takes me about 2 hours to get from home to my office, and they let me go home every night. I am working with a group of older male officers, who are incredibly funny and immature in all the right ways, not the annoying ways. It is in an office, which is not at all what I wanted, but its a very nice work environment, and no one asks me to make them coffee. As for what I do, well this week it was mostly reading (finished Call of the Wild and In the Land of Israel by Amos Oz- which I highly recommend), but if I stay there I will be doing some combination of a) teaching english, b) teaching Microsoft Office, and c) making a movie about how you have to make sure to check the air something so that something doesnt happen and the plane doesnt crash. I clearly understood the technical aspects of this movie.
The exciting part of my week was that I got to go on two tours. The first was of my base- there was a group of visiting high school electricians (yes, they learn this stuff in hs here) that came to learn about the types of jobs they could have in the army. So I got to see all the electrical whatnots that they put in the plane and learn about all the smart bombs and cool technology that the Israeli army is using these days. And I got to go near the F-16's which was a little sad, but mostly cool.
The second tour was to the IDF museum and Etzel museum in Yaffo. Etzel is one of the military groups that fought before the War of Independence and eventually joined the Haganah to form the Israeli army. They are also the ones that blew up the King David hotel, and at one point managed to steal 10 tons of artillery from the British army with about 10 men. The IDF museum is in the old Turkish train station and houses basically everything military and historical, from Ben Gurions car (he drove a Ford!) to every tank and gun they could get their hands on. It was kind of crazy learning about each of the Israeli wars (from a non-Diaspora Jew perspective) and seeing the weapons that they were using. The War of Independence really is a freaking miracle- these people were armed with Mexican canons from the 1900's and weapons they designed, like the Davidka, which doesnt really do so much but makes a really big noise. And that was frequently enough to scare away the Arab forces they were fighting. And as we went forward in time through each war and the crazy odds we were against, its really amazing that we still exist.
And then we got to the war on terror, which we are still fighting now and I just started to get angry. Its ridiculous that 60 something years later we still have to fight to be recognized, still have to argue that we deserve to be here, still have to deal with people who want to deny our right to exist.
And the craziest part about it is that while I am getting all worked up and upset about what our tour guide is telling us, all these other soldiers are taking it in stride. True, some of them just arent paying attention, but for the most part, they are just used to it. They are used to the fact that this is how it is and even if they agree that it is unjust and unfair, it doesnt get to them because it is no longer fresh.
I feel like every day I learn something new about Israel or Israelis and every time I am shocked by the strength and endurance that they show. I have heard Americans be accused of being naive and optimistic, and I am beginning to understand why that is a bad thing to Israelis. I see how they can look at us and think we are silly for clinging so dearly to our ideals of fairness and justice for all when they are fighting nail and tooth to stay alive. But I also see how important it is, that there are still those who are young and idealistic and willing to sacrifice for what they believe is right.
I have long found myself torn between the democratic ideals and beliefs I have been raised with and the determination to help Israel survive and remain a Jewish land despite, and in spite of, those who wish to see us destroyed. Because the truth is, they frequently clash. The clash of democracy vs theocracy, of security vs. equality, nationality vs. humanity. And I dont have the answer for it all, I dont have any solutions, and while at times it becomes overwhelming and I just dont want to think about it anymore and dont want to argue about it anymore- I thank God that I have not become complacent. That I still feel the injustices, on both sides of the spectrum, and that I still believe that we can find some kind of equilibrium
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