Shabbat Christmas

Two weeks in America and it still just feels like vacation. It is cold here. And Christmasy. It's funny, I was never anti-Christmas and I still love the lights and going to my Bubbie's for the holiday, but now it feels like from the moment I landed the whole country was shoving its Christmas cheer down my throat. Within two minutes of landing, before the seat belt sign even turned off, there were carols playing on the plane. Everything has Santa on it or fir trees or wreaths. And while there are some nice sales as a result, holy lord its a little overwhelming. But now the holiday is over, and I have to say, I actually enjoyed the day, if not all the hype that led up to it.

My brothers and I drove up to NY last Wednesday, and while the hour long debate they had about Roman warfare while speaking in exaggerated (and bad) Southern accents was annoying to say the least, I have missed them and it was nice to spend time with my little brothers. Barak and I stayed at Shosh and Ez's for a few days while Rafi galavanted around NYC with his friends. I was content to stay in Riverdale and hang out with my nephew and watch Bones (which is my rebound show after two years of watching nothing but Glee). I got to have lunch with one friend, and while it was really nice to catch up I have finally realized that in the past two years my friends have all moved to new places and made new social circles and while they will always be my friends we are now the "grab a coffee and catch up when you are in town" friends and no longer the "Hey, what are you up to tonight?" friends that we used to be. But steering clear of the unknown depths of what my social life is going to look like for the next five months, on Friday Shosh, Ez, and Alon, and Rafi, Barak, and I all headed up to New Hampshire for Shabbat Christmas with Bubbie. We had family dinner on Friday night, which my aunt and uncle had to leave early in order to make it to church, but that was fine. The boys all bickered and Bubbie had fun listening and everyone doted on Alon. It was nice family time. Christmas/Shabbat morning we all got up early and I had enough time to daven before we all had to congregate around the tree to open presents. We were all given our Chrismakkah gifts and lounged around the tree in an overflow of wrapping paper and empty boxes.

We had cholent- our cousins favorite food- for lunch and lounged about reading and napping in typical Shabbat style. We said havdallah an hour before Christmas dinner and whipped up some spaghetti to eat as the main course was a very not kosher deep-fried turkey. Uncle Steve and his moustache were a huge source of entertainment for Alon, and thus for the rest of the family, and all in all it was really nice quality family time. I do understand why this is such a popular holiday. I just think the commercialism is a bit of an overload.

Anyway family time was cut short when my father called with a blizzard warning and we ended up packing up and heading out that night in an attempt to beat the storm home. I am now in NY watching the snow blowing around and looking forward to a few cozy days with my sister's family. Hopefully I will be able to make it to Boston for New Years with my favorite person and after that, well classes, and real life, begins.

All my bags are packed, I'm ready to go

My apartment looks so empty. my room so lonely. Most of the week our apartment looked like it had been raped with trash everywhere, suitcases in piles exploding all over the place and a ridiculous amount of STUFF scattered all over every surface. But now it is Friday, and we are all cleaned up. Still, the walls are bare (as all the art on them belonged to me) me room looks naked and a surprisingly large amount of boxes sit in the corner waiting to be moved to Efrat. Nechama moved out on Sunday and the new roommate, Ilana, moved in on Tuesday. My replacement is coming on Sunday and it very much feels like the end of an era. For two years, this apartment was my home and the people that gathered here became my family.
I am excited to come back to the States, in fact I am more than ready to move on to the next step, thrilled that I am going to get to spend so much time with my family and friends. And kind of hoping for some snow (knowing my luck, there will be none, despite the Snowmageddon of last year). I feel ready for this move, and for that I am glad. I know that I will be coming back soon and five months will fly by, but again, it is this feeling of moving on to something else, of taking the next step that is making me pause, sitting on my couch that will soon no longer be mine, saying goodbye to an apartment that already feels like a memory.
And now I am getting overly poetic which I really shouldn't do, as two years in Israel has severely impaired my vocabulary. So I am going to head out, enjoy my last Shabbat in Israel (for awhile), and I will see you all soon!!

Home for the Holidays

I know it has been awhile, and for that I apologize. It was a combination of lack of time and lack of anything exciting to say. And partially an aversion to having to relive my week and take out the valuable parts.

I find that my mood is fluctuating alot and I am having trouble thinking about why. There are alot of emotions tied to my almost imminent departure, both good and bad. There are days when I cannot believe I am leaving for so long, and others when I cannot wait to get out of here. I am ready for the change that these few months will bring, but I do worry about having to come back and start from scratch in Haifa.

Esti and I

Last night my roommates fiancee, Avi invited us over to sing with him while he lit candles so he wasn't alone. It was only about 20 minutes, and only a few of us, but it was the kind of request that one asks of their "Oleh" family, and it made me smile to be with mine. Tonight was "Family Channukah". It started with a brief visit to the Auerbach Family dinner, to which the invitation alone reminded me how much a part of the family they consider me. I then had to rush home for my "family" as my roommates and a few close friends were planning on lighting together, eating some latkas and exchanging gifts. It was so nice to line up and light with my friends and then sit around youtubing Channukah songs, eating a ridiculous amount of fried food (this is totally a southern holiday) and swapping silly gifts. It really felt like home and made me realize how much of a home this apartment has become. Not just in terms of how comfortable I feel here, but how many of our friends find refuge in our apartment and come to us when life is kicking their ass. More of my friends came over around 8, thankfully bringing some salad to cleanse our palettes before the next round of latkas (these ones were zucchini!) and providing this wonderful comfortable atmosphere of friendship and food. 

I have missed my family on every one of the holidays (especially Thanksgiving), but it was so nice to see all my different families come together with me for this one. It comforts me to know that these people are more than friends or neighbors. They are the you of Israel. These are the people that will miss me when I am gone and welcome me back when I return. Coming back to America is never had because I know my family waits for me and misses me and cares for me. And today was the very necessary reminder that I have managed to build that here as well. 

I wish you all a wonderful Channukah full of light and love and latkas.

Our Chanukayot

Gaf Ohad was in My House!

There were many things that I accomplished this week. Like an expedition to my bank that included lying bus drivers, and driving the wrong way down a one-way street. Like discovering the most disgusting smell in existence because I clean up after lazy rich people. Like seeing Shakespeare at the Jerusalem Theater (Macbeth is totally messed up). BUT the best part of the whole week was my Mesibat Shicrur (Release Party) last night. 

Elodie and I

My friend Elodie and I made aliyah at the same time, went to ulpan together, both decided to volunteer for the army, went through basic training together, and both ended up in the Air Force. So, of course, it was only natural that we throw this socially required party together. We invited our group of lone soldier friends and all my friends from the neighborhood, but it was clearly going to be a very American party. That is until half the guys from my office showed up, including my two commanders! I had invited them, but since they all like almost an hour away and knew this was going to be a very english-speaking party, I did not actually expect anyone to come. 

But come they did, bearing beer and presents (they gave me a big collage of army pictures, and then one of me and Alon, because they know how much I obsess over him). And then, like the wonderful people that they are, they came in and became the life of the party. They heckled Mia all through the embarrassingly sweet speech she gave about me, became best friends with David (Davida's husband) the only other Hebrew speaker there, and had a blast talking to all the different lone soldiers. They are all ridiculous people, and sitting with them in my home as they laughed and joked and did all their usual shtuyot (um, jokes? ridiculousness? I dont know how to translate this word), well they just made the party for me. It meant so much to me that they came.

Gaf Ohad

I am still smiling about it. I know I have said it time and again, but these people really made everything I went through in the past year worth it. I wish y'all could meet these amazing people, and that they could meet you! Guess pictures will have to do though...

The Joys of Being a Civilian

Sorry I am sending this one a little late. I was working on Friday and did not have time.

Did she say working? I thought she was on vacation and enjoying doing nothing!

As it turns out. Doing nothing can get really boring. And it causes your butt to fall asleep. So this past week I found all sorts of wonderful things to DO that I could not/ did not do when I was a soldier. These included:

1. Sleeping In. It only took about two days to untrain my body from getting up at 6:30 am and I can now happily sleep until 11. The only bad side effects are some very weird morning dreams and an occasionally missed morning prayer.
2. Going to see Art. Jojo and I went on a wonderful hike through the concrete jungle of Jerusalem and ended up at the new and improved Israel Museum, where, after a mostly boring "archeological" tour, we got to look at art and have a long heated debate about what that means. It was lovely :)
3. Learn Torah. Not only did I get to have my weekly learning session with my friend Ophra, but we also went to a shiur (lecture) on Abraham and why God chose to speak to him. 
4. Make Money. I have started working as a cleaning lady, and with the three jobs I had this past week, made more money than I made in a month as a soldier. Cleaning is tiring, but I like it well enough and it makes way more money than babysitting. Still a pittance compared to what I would make in America, but it is good enough for me.
5. Enjoy Strange Israeli Cultural Events. Like the Jerusalem Renaissance Festival. As a big fan of the Maryland Renfest, I had high expectations, but aside from the coolness of getting to go through the Christian quarter of the old city, it was mostly a bunch of Israelis dressed up and acting like crazy people. There was a fire-thrower and some contortionists as well as a man with a pretty cool music box. But it is kind of weird to hear knights fake fighting while insulting each other in Hebrew. AND there were NO turkey legs or funnel cakes! What is the point of a Renfest in Israel if they dont have those foods I have been drooling over for years?

Otherwise, it was a pretty chill week. Boris called to tell me he missed me. I got to hang out with alot of different friends, and I am actually enjoying cooking for myself and eating good healthy food! (well maybe not always healthy, but I try sometimes).

One last army story-השחרור

When I came back to Israel after my visit in America, I was met with a stack of paperwork that the army wanted me to sign. Apparently they had written down the date I left America as the date I arrived in Israel and thus had miscalculated my vacation days. I was one day short. So, the army made me sign up for an extra day of service to make up for. Annoying, but okay.

This meant that instead of Sunday, October 17th, I was going to be released on Monday, October 18th. No biggie, right?

Your last day in the army you come in in civilian clothes, bring all the stuff the army has given you, and go through a "check-out" process at all the various offices on base (clinic, field office, education, etc.). Most people host a "shtiya" and bring in some cakes and drinks and have a little goodbye party. I was all set to do these things on Monday.

Well I showed up on Sunday to base, ready to enjoy my last real day in the office, as a soldier, in uniform. Around noon, I was sitting in the canteen enjoying lunch with my friends (compliments of Boris, who was very distraught with the fact that this was my last lunch at the canteen). When we get a call from the Misrad Harishum (sort of like the front office of the base) asking where I was and how come I had not started my clearance ("check-out"). We all kind of laughed, and said "What are you talking about? She gets out tomorrow!". After a lengthy discussion in which they told me that I would be considered a deserter if I did not finish my clearance TODAY, we went to find my commander. 

There was many a phone call, many a "What do you mean she gets out TODAY?", and quite a few moments of laughter and comments on how, of course, this would happen to me, it was discovered that the Misrad Tash, who had made me sign up for an extra day of service, had then forgotten to file the paperwork and it was never processed. So now, I am on base, in uniform with none of my stuff and being told I have to leave the army TODAY or I will be considered a deserter.

There was a brief plan in which we were going to drive back to Jerusalem (a 40 min car ride, 2 hour bus ride) to get my stuff, but by the time 3 o'clock rolled around, we still had no car and there was no way that we would make it back in time. So in one of those amazing feats that my commander can accomplish, they let me sign that I had given back all of my stuff without giving back anything. Boris, the sweetheart, and I then frantically ran around the base getting all the signatures needed for my clearance and by 5 o'clock I was officially no longer a soldier. Though I still left in uniform.

Boris, Roi, and Almog

And then I had to come back the next day, just to give back all my stuff. Although, it did mean I got to sit around in civilian clothes and watch Shachaf work for a change. 

What an incredibly appropriate ending to my army service.

Lihi and I

Home, Alon

Lordy, it has been so long! And so much happened! (Wait, did it? Shoot, how far back do I have to think now?). Okay, we are going to do this in two parts. I will even color code.

I choose this color for America because America is green. It is also big, thus the easy-to-read font size.

America was awesome. Pretty much all of my pictures are of Alon, and I think I could have spent a whole month with just him (and a month's supply of mommy-milk) and been happy. It was a wonderfully family-filled trip, and while I did not get to see all of you (and am kind of bummed out about that) I have to say, it was a much needed vacation with much-missed people. I got to spend a good amount of time with my sister and brother in law (Hey Ez, did I tell you that in Hebrew you are my Geese. Yup, not only is it shorter than the English but it makes you a bird) and got to watch them becoming parents. And I got to spend time with my brothers and participate in their college experience (okay, so its not so different from mine, but still) and I got to spend quality time with both of my parents. I got to do all the family things like fighting and crying and laughing and teasing and shooting and cooking. And I got to finish the painting project I started last year that no one bothered to finish!

So all in all, I had a really good time. Such a good time, in fact, that when the time came to leave I didnt want to. Which kind of worried me. Enough that I stayed awake my whole flight watching movies so I didnt have to think about anything. Also because there were alot of good movies. 

I choose this color for Israel because it is kind of the color that everything is right now. And I have bolded it because people here yell alot. 

Anyway, once I landed in Israel and had a nice fight with the driver that took me home, I started to feel happy to be back. Driving into Jerusalem will always make me happy, even if I have only been away for a few hours. A few of my friends came over to greet me, all the guys from my office called me to welcome me back and I was surrounded by much love and sushi. I had a few days off to unpack and recover from jet lag, and then I went to Kibbutz Ein Tzurim for a very good Yom Kippur. Yes, we prayed for 7 hours, had a 45 min break and then went back for the last 3 hours, but there was so much good energy there. We sang our prayers and everyone was so present! It was more joyful and mournful and I think that is actually okay for the Day of Judgement. Because after all, we are not perfect and we hopefully all just spent ten days thinking about what we did wrong and how we want to be better. And this day, this is the day to tell Hashem how much we love Him and pray for mercy. It was a very loving environment and I had a really meaningful Yom Kippur as a result.

On Sunday I headed back to base for the first time. I was met with big hugs and exclamations of how much they had missed me and then the inevitable annoying paperwork because the army or I confused something along the way. Long story short, I had to sign on to serve one extra day because someone wrote down the dates of my trip wrong.. I then went home to deal with the University where I am trying to take some classes next semester and was met with more incompetence and misunderstandings. I experienced that again when I went to try to get my phone fixed and got home with an overwhelming desire for my mother. 

And this is Israel. This juxtaposition of moments that are so frustrating and hair-wrenching that they make you say "What the hell am I doing here?!?" and moments that are so liberating and exhilarating that you think "Wow, I am so lucky to be a part of this." I got a ride the other day from a woman who made aliyah fourteen years ago and was still overjoyed with the fact that she lives in ISRAEL. I listened to her go on about how lucky and happy she is to be here and I hoped that twelve years from now I will still be that excited. Because it is HARD. It is so freaking hard sometimes when you just cant say what you want to say or do what you need to do because you dont know how or it doesn't exist, or if it does you don't know how to find it! So I don't know why I am still happy to be back. Why, like every Israeli I know, there comes a point after all that frustration and yelling that I can take a deep breath and say "It will all work out" and believe it. 

I think you do have to be crazy to live here. I certainly feel like I am sometimes.